The second child....

Ya know, when I found out I was pregnant, and probably even before then I was DETERMINED that he would get just as much attention as Jake did.... well obviously I did an awful job at holding up that ideal. I've been going back through posts from when I found out I was pregnant with Jake, all through my pregnancy with him and his week by week posts. WOW... Poor Dawson. I think he got one lousy post while I was pregnant and that was, hey, I'm pregnant. Not even one pregnancy shot of my belly.
So here is Jake and I taken 3 days before Dawson was born.

I will say this second pregnancy was ROUGH to say the least. I just never really got over the nausea and extreme fatigue. Pregnancy does not agree with me. I thought about posting, but just never did. When Jake got to bed at night I was DONE. Gerald as with Jake's pregnancy was a GOD SEND. Not ONCE did he complain about the condition of the house, the lack of groceries in the house, the lack of dinner on the table, having to hear me whine and complain all day every day, the lack of ANYTHING getting done outside of keeping Jake alive and surviving myself. His heart to serve me was humbling. If I needed something, he got it. If I needed him home, he was there. If I needed a break, he took Jake. If I needed sleep, he made it happen. OHH.... and I haven't even mentioned the fact that we moved at the end of March (in my 3rd trimester) and he practically packed up the entire house by himself even though I was home all day.... STILL not ONE complaint. Thankfully he did have help from my parents and some friends when it came to actually moving. He still did the brunt of the labor though.... while I sat... and sat... and sat... and entertained Jake as much as I could. It was an emotional time to move... I wouldn't suggest it, ha! I still miss that home sometimes, but I think it's because we moved in my 3rd trimester and had Dawson right after, I just haven't had a chance to really make this house a home. I did (with the help of my friend Lucilynn) get the boys rooms done pretty quick after we moved, so that made me happy.

So back to Dawson... He is a sweet sweet baby. His smile melts my heart everyday. Ya know, I had a hard time, like most Mom's, thinking about loving another boy as much as I love Jake. Just as people told me though, you just grow another heart.

This was his first real smile and I caught it on camera!! (June 24, 2012)

Our hospital stay was pretty uneventful, which was a nice change from Jake's. First off, I've had several ask if Dawsone also has the Long QT Syndrome. The short answer is... we don't know yet. They did the blood draw for the genetic testing in the hospital, but somehow it was delayed getting sent off and we're still waiting to hear the results. He has had two EKG's and both were normal, so we're hoping that's a good sign. He's currently not on any meds. 

I'm going to try and just focus on his first month during this post. So, we were welcomed home to a house full of cousins! We were SO BLESSED to have my sister and her family DRIVE all the way from Charlotte, NC to spend 9 days with us. If you're wondering where we put everyone, we put the three older cousins (Josh - 9, Caleb - 5 and Ella - 3) in the RV with Grammie and Granddad. Then Aunt Tonya, Uncle Donnie and Erin(18 months) stayed in Dawson's room. (I need to do an entirely different post just talking about the time that Grammie and Granddad spent with us before D was born) Anyway, the kids had a BLAST!! We were worried that they would get bored... and maybe they did at times, but for the most part I think everyone had a great time just being together. Jake ATE IT UP!! He still asks to have his cousins come back and play :-(  Anyway, luckily they were here during fairly mild temps, so the kids were able to spend a lot of time outside playing in the pool, on the swing set and jumping on the trampoline. I can't even begin to list all the ways I was blessed while they were here. They helped with Jake, cooked ALL meals, did the grocery shopping, cleaned my house and took care of me while I took care of Dawson. His first month was rough when it came to sleep. He wanted NOTHING to do with a paci, yet couldn't get his hand/fist/thumb/finger in his mouth either. So it was tough to comfort him at times which broke my heart. He spent a lot of time nursing and wanted to nurse every two hours. The nights were REALLY rough because wanting to eat every two hours equaled Mommy sleeping about 45 min at a time between feedings. He wasn't speedy at eating. Now as I write this I wish I had kept up with the blog because this first month is now a blur in my rearview mirror. Of course I guess not much happens with a newborn, so there wouldn't be much to tell, just cute pictures to look at... so I guess that's what I'll let you see now...

 

Dawson month one from Gerald Miller on Vimeo.

Count it ALL joy....

This will just be a short entry of some things that have been on my mind today. (Don't worry, as I type this I'm uploading pictures of Dawson's first month to share with you)... yes he's 3 months old.. I'm trying to catch up.
Anyway, this parenting thing is a challenge some days. You look at these precious gifts that the Lord has given you and sometimes you want to eat them up because you're so in love with them and other times you want to go run away... far away, and pray they don't follow. This is one of THOSE days. I can't say there is one thing that has caused this behavior, but a combination of several. First, Jake is done with his paci (YAY!) He finally bit the tip right off and well... they don't work so good like that. So the #1 issue is sleep. He's just not sleeping as well so therefore not the most rested happy boy around. 2. He's a big brother now and unfortunately for him that means sacrifice of Mommy time, sacrifice of having his wants met immediately, sacrifice of getting out of the house as often as we use to. 3. Changes in weather 4. Mommy's lack of sleep and slightly shorter fuse.. obviously Mommy's problem, not Jake's, but unfortunately he's at the other end of the short fuse at times. I've had to ask for his forgiveness for raising my voice more times that I would like to admit. All that to say, counting it ALL joy has been a challenge this week.
I'm reading a book now (if you are a parent, it is a MUST READ) called "Don't Make Me Count To Three" It talks about the fact that when we are dealing with our children and their behavior, it is not our child presae that we're dealing with, it's the SIN that lives in them. I mean, admit it, they are sinful little creatures. "Foolishness is bound up in the heart of a child,...." Proverbs 22:15. The behavior a child/person exhibits is an expression of the overflow of the heart. Simply put the heart determines behavior. It's our responsibility as parents to help them discover and realize that sin in their heart is what's causing them to behave the way they do. It's our responsibility to show them their NEED for a savior, their NEED for forgivness, their NEED for CHRIST in their life.
This is where I'm suppose to "count it all joy..." (SO much easier said than done) Because each time there is a need for discipline and instruction during the day, it is another opportunity to point Jake towards Christ. Isn't that our ultimate goal in ALL situations anyway? I need to be thankful to be able to point my child(ren) to the ONE who can change their heart, change their behavior, change their way of thinking, change their LIFE. It's not always easy to remember this school of thought in the midst of the battle, but if I can continue to remind myself of this goal when we're NOT in the middle of a battle then it will be easier to recall when I need it most. Okay... so I kind of got off of the track I was intending to go down. The words and actions that my 2 year old displayed to me today were hurtful... VERY hurtful. It's amazing how words and actions from such a small person can hurt so much. Through it all, I was finding it hard to forgive him. (That's something I've started when time out or whatever is over. We've always prayed and asked God for forgivness, but now I have him ask me for forgivness.) Today it was hard to say, "yes, I forgive you".... because I confess, I was BITTER. This took me by surprise because how in the world could I have a hard time forgiving my child who I would EASILY give my life for?!? Of course I have now forgiven him, but it has caused me to look at my relationship with The Lord and how many times I have disrespected/disobeyed Him through words/actions/behaviors, yet he ALWAYS forgives me.. no questions asked, no hesitation, no second thoughts, no bitterness... just MERCY and FORGIVNESS. How undeserving am I? To think that God KNEW how I would behave, he KNEW how I would sin, He KNEW when I would disobey yet He STILL sent His ONLY Son to die on a cross for me. Humbled and undeserving are the words that come to mind. To think of the way I felt today and the behaviors I was dealing with and the grudge I was wanting to hold, how dare I not give the same Grace that has been given to me. Boy am I glad that The Lord does not deal with me as he should. YES, there HAS to be discipline, and it's not fun, but that's not the issue. The issue is my heart in "dishing it out". Today my child caused me to be that much more thankful for what I have through Christ and His love and Grace towards me.

Let's Rewind...

February 2012
This was a fun month that deserves a blog entry. I hope you can follow my random posts going back and forth in time. Starting in February my parents came West from Dallas to Caprock Canyons State Park to do some camp hosting. We got some crazy weather during their time there. My February/March folder goes from pictures in the snow....

...to our weekend at Caprock Canyons State Park with Grammie and Granddad. We were able to go twice, once at the end of February, and once mid March just Jake and I. Both trips were a BLAST. Jake just LOVES being outdoors. He would walk until his legs fell off if we let him. The first trip was spent playing at a park, throwing rocks it the lake, watching the Bison and riding around in the back of Granddad's truck.

The second trip was more hiking than anything. Jake enjoyes rocks, dirt and cactus, so he was in heaven. I was waddling by this time, but still enjoyed myself. Jake got to experience his first hot dog roast and his first smores. YUMMY!!

 We kept Jake away from Grammie while she literally ROASTED her marshmallow

 It was SO GREAT to be able to make these memories with Grammie and Granddad.

Just a side note... Jake has changed SO MUCH just since these pictures. Where has my baby gone?? He's turning into a little boy. He is such an amazing kiddo. He has the sweetest spirit, a servants heart, he loves to make others laugh, and he lights up a room with his smile. He is such a blessing to our family!

A Family of FOUR

So I'm overwhelmed at the thought of actually catching up on the blog... not going to happen. I hate that you have all missed out on so much of our goings on... lots of cute pictures. Jake has changed drastically over the last 6 or so months and we've obviously grown by 10 fingers and 10 toes. Instead of talking about everything that's happened, in one post I'm going to DO MY BEST to create one post a day this week.
So I'll start with the obvious...

WELCOME DAWSON RAY MILLER

6 lbs 11oz

19"

Believe it or not the delivery was easy. I had contractions for several days before he was born, but nothing major. Then the evening of Mothers Day the contractions REALLY started. I had no idea how fast my labor was actually going. I kindof wish now I hadn't had the epidural because apparently I was in the thick of it before I got the epidural and didn't realize it. All I knew was that the contractions were much more painful than what I had ever experienced with Jake and I THOUGHT they could only get worse. I progressed faster than the nurses expected me too as well. They left the room around 4:30 a.m. and didn't intend to even come back until 7:00 to check me and see how things were going. Well, Dawson had other plans. His heart rate dropped around 5:30ish which caused the nurse to come into the room. She rolled me over onto my side and I FELT a VERY strong contraction, lots of pressure. So she decided to go ahead and check me. To OUR great surprise my water had broke and I was ready to go!! I had another strong contraction, she checked me again and he was "heading out". There was no time for the doctor to get in the room. One leg in the stirrup, not even a full push and he literally fell out into the waiting hands of the nurse. Shortly after the Doctor walked in, ha! It was a whirlwind for sure. Dawson was good minus low blood sugar. So they had to give him some formula directly into his little stomach... he had already been nursing for almost a full hour before this. He also had a hard time keeping his body temp up so he had to chill under the warmers for awhile as well as some skin to skin with Mommy which I loved. There are more details to this crazy night, but I want this to be a blog post, not a novel. Maybe I'll tell the whole story later... but you know I probably won't. 



Christmas 2011

What an AMAZING Christmas we had! We decided this year that instead of us buying 3 plane tickets and flying all the way to Charlotte, or the Nuzum clan buying 5 plane tickets and flying to TX that we would all drive and meet at a central location. Thanks to Gerald's sister, Merry, we were able to get hooked up at an AMAZING hunting lodge just outside Tuscaloosa, AL. It's called Zidon Avisha and owned by an the sweetest couple you could meet. We were truly blessed by them.
So our journey began on Thursday, Dec. 22nd around 8:30 a.m. We were COMPLETELY loaded down.

We didn't even care that we had such a LONG drive ahead of us, we were SO EXCITED to FINALLY be with family again after a long 7 months. The first day we drove from Lubbock to Shreveport, LA (with a stop to stretch our legs in Mesquite) where we stayed at a hotel for the night. This was our first hotel stay with Jake and he did GREAT. We all slept surprisingly well. We got up, had a yummy breakfast and got back on the road around 9:00. Jake was such a trooper in the car. He is NOT a fan of sleeping in the car so he never got much more than a 45 min. nap each day. It never phased him though, we brought along plenty to keep him busy, plus the DVD player, of course.
So, we all arrived at Zidon Avisha within 20 min of each other.... pretty good considering we were all coming from 3 different directions. It was SO GREAT to be together again. It was a little chilly when we arrived, but not too bad. We were all in awe of this beautiful house we were staying in. (Mom and Dad stayed in their RV right outside, not that there wasn't PLENTY of room for them inside).

The first 3 days it was cold and rainy outside so most of the fun was had inside, where there was PLENTY to do. There was a pool table, ping-pong table, two huge TVs, a sun room where the kids could run and play, we brought our Wii along, and of course, just good 'ol cousin fun.

Once the weather cleared up, though, out we went and pretty much stayed for most of the day. We did a lot of fishing, walking, exploring, rock collecting, and "tractor" (golf cart) riding. We all loved being outside, it was BEAUTIFUL, and there was PLENTY of room to run.

Dad went fishing for a little more than fish... a basketball, and the end of a fishing pole to be exact.

Christmas morning was a blast with all the cousins together. We listened to Tonya read and Josh recite from memory the Christmas story. Our family has always made it a priority to remember what CHRISTmas is all about. The reading of The Christmas story has been a tradition for as long as I can remember. Then we got to open presents, Jake really got into it this year.
As you will see, there were plenty of presents to be opened.

A fun time was had by ALL! I couldn't ask for more. We are so incredibly blessed. I just wish we didn't all live so far away so that we could get together like this more than once a year!!

By the end, we were wiped out, but our hearts were full!!

Christmas decorating

It's beginning to look a lot like Christmas at the Miller house. I have so enjoyed my new found love for the everyday I couldn't wait to get the house clean and ready for Christmas decorating. I spent the week after Thanksgiving getting everything in order for a fun Saturday with the family. I looked forward to it all week. I was worried at one point we would have to postpone because Jake-Man came down with a fever Thurs. afternoon. Luckily by Sat he was as fit as a fiddle.
We started out our Saturday morning by staying in our jammies and enjoying a YUMMY green chili and bacon breakfast pizza.

After that it was time to unpack the train that goes around the tree. To say Jake was excited would be an understatment!

Admiring the Engine....

 

After playing with the train a little it was time to start on the Christmas tree! Jake was a big help!!

A short break to admire the engine once more...

Make sure it's not crooked, Dad!

Helping Mommy with the lights.

Hanging ornaments

Jake's all landed on the same spot on the tree. He had so much fun looking at all the different ornaments. We'll be lucky if they actually end up staying ON the tree.

Finally it's all said and done. After finally getting dressed for the day, a little time to adimire the train once again.

And a day topped off with a story with Daddy...

We had such an amazing Saturday together. Ya know, our decorations aren't perfect, they aren't fancy, they aren't glamerous... but they are ours, and I LOVE them. We are so very blessed. I love our growing family of 3!!