I received the following email today that got me thinking.
Subject: When do I quit worrying about my kids??
Answer: Until I hear God say to me, "Welcome home".
WORRY
Is there an imaginary cutoff period when
offspring become accountable
for their own actions?
Is there some wonderful moment when
parents can become detached spectators in
the lives of their children and shrug,
'It's Their life,' and feel nothing?
When I was in my twenties, I stood in a hospital corridor
waiting for doctors to put a few stitches in my daughter's
head and I asked, 'When do you stop worrying?'
The nurse said, 'When they get out of the accident stage..'
My Parents just smiled faintly and said nothing.
When I was in my thirties, I sat on a little chair in a
classroom and heard how one of my children talked
incessantly, disrupted the class,and was headed for a
career making license plates.
As if to read my mind, a teacher said, 'Don't worry,
they all go through this stage and then you can sit back,
relax and enjoy them.'
My Parents just smiled faintly and said nothing.
When I was in my forties, I spent a lifetime waiting
for the phone to ring, the cars to come home,
the front door to open. A friend said,
'They're trying to find themselves. Don't worry!
In a few years, they'll be adults. They'll be off on their own
they'll be out of your hair' My Parents just smiled faintly
And said nothing.
By the time I was 50, I was sick & tired of being vulnerable.
I was still worrying over my children, but there was a new wrinkle..
Even though they were on their own I continued to anguish over their failures, be tormented by their frustrations and absorbed in their disappointments..and there was nothing I could do about it.
My Parents just smiled faintly and said nothing.
My friends said that when my kids got married
I could stop worrying and lead my own life.
I wanted to believe that, but I was haunted by my parent's
warm smiles and their occasional, 'You look pale. Are you
all right' ?'Call me the minute you get home'. 'Are you
depressed about something?'
My friends said that when I became a grandparent
that I would get to enjoy the happy little voices yelling
Grandma! Papa!
But now I find that I worry just as much about the little kids
as the big ones. How can anyone cope with all this Worry?
Can it be that parents are sentenced to a lifetime of worry?
Is concern for one another handed down like a torch to
blaze the trail of human frailties and the fears of the unknown?
Is concern a curse or is it a virtue that elevates us
to the highest form of earthly creation?
Recently, one of my own children became quite irritable,
saying to me,'Where were you? I've been calling for 3 days,
and no one answered I was worried.'
I smiled a warm smile.
The torch has been passed.
PASS IT ON TO OTHER WONDERFUL PARENTS
(And also to your children... That's the fun part)
First of all, my intention is not at all meant to disrespect the author of this email. I understand the sentiment of it as I’m sure all parents would. I just became deeply convicted about the subject of worry and how it can affect my life and the life of my family.
Is the torch of worry really something I want to pass onto my children? Is that a habit that I want to model? In looking through the scriptures I found several verses that REALLY spoke to me. The first is one I know we’ve all heard time and time again….
Matthew 6:33-34 33 But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. 34 Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own
I remember reading this verse over and over again growing up. Do not worry… do not worry… do not worry… Easier said than done, I always said!! Of course I’m going to worry! I live in this world don’t I? Have you read the newspaper? Read the news? Lived my life?? Especially now; Just like the email said, I’m a Mom, I TEND TO WORRY MORE!...but the scriptures say “DO NOT WORRY”. That’s hard to do. I have a son that has Long QT Syndrome. A condition that has NO symptoms, yet could potentially take his life at any moment. So do I worry?? YES!! But what kind of life is that for me or Jake if my days are filled with worry, stress and fear? I can’t live my life in fear and worry.
2 Timothy 1:6-8 tells us: 6 Therefore I remind you to stir up the gift of God which is in you through the laying on of my hands. 7 For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.
Okay, so God doesn’t want me to walk in fear. He wants me to walk in complete peace, love and a sound mind. HOW do I do that? The ONLY way I can do that is THROUGH HIM. I have to draw all my strength through KNOWING Christ (reading/studying scripture, going to church, surrounding myself with other believers). I can’t trust someone I don’t first know. Because I KNOW my God and I KNOW His ways are higher than mine, I can have peace in that. Does that mean it’s all peachy all the time? No! The scriptures also tell us that we will face trials of many kinds… and even then we’re supposed to be joyful!!
James 1: 2-3 2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,[a] whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.
Testing of my faith. I walk that day in and day out. I have to have faith that God has a plan for Jake. (We believe it is complete healing of his heart) Through this daily “testing” my faith grows as does my relationship with the Lord. I want to persevere, not just survive or go through the motions. I want to live with joy and peace! Through Christ I can do that!
Philippians 4:6-7
6 Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 7 And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Now THAT is that kind of peace I want to have. The peace that passes ALL UNDERSTANDING!! How do I live day to day knowing that the slightest scare or the wrong cold medicine could send my son into cardiac arrest? BY PRAYER AND PETITION & WITH THANKSGIVING. Thanksgiving that I have another day with my son. Thanksgiving that I HAVE a son. Thanksgiving that I have a savior that LOVES ME and calls me His own. Thankful that I have assurance of my salvation. Thankful that I’m raising my son in a way that he too will know the love of our Savior and will go to live with Him one day in eternity. It’s a DAILY act to take my thoughts captive and cast my cares on HIM. Only GOD can give me that kind of peace.
Here is the way it’s put in The Message Bible
6-7Don't fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God's wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It's wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.
There is the answer. Only CHRIST can displace worry at the center of your life!! ONLY CHRIST!!
1 Peter 5:6-8
6 Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time. 7 Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. 8 Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour.
For so many of us, including me, that “lion” is worry. Worry can devour us soooooo easily. It can consume us!! So we must always stay alert and close with our Savior, Our Shepherd. The sheep know their shepherd by His voice. I can’t follow the lead of my Shepherd if I don’t know the sound of His voice. And I can’t know His voice if I don’t spend time with Him daily, in His word and in prayer. I must humble myself daily under My Father’s Mighty Hand. I KNOW that He cares for me and that He cares for Jake. I know that He has mighty plans for my son! They are plans to prosper Him and NOT to harm him. (Jer. 29:11) Does that promise a long and prosperous life for him (or any of us) and a life of ease?? Absolutely Not, but it does promise us a life FULL of HIM!!
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not going to pretend to understand it all. No one does. I will never understand why “bad things happen to good people”. I’ll never understand why some prayers are answered on this side of heaven while others are not. I will not pretend to understand why there are children and families that suffer even after begging and pleading with God; Families that are serving God with their lives. All I do know is that His ways are higher than mine. That he works ALL things together for the Good of those who love Him.
So…. Do I worry?? ABSOLUTELY!!! Do I want to lead a life of worry?? ABSOLUTELY NOT!! I want to teach Jake that beyond Mommy and Daddy there is a Heavenly Father that holds his precious life. A Father that knows him better than we do. A Father that cherishes him more than we ever can imagine. A Father that DOES have a plan for him and a Father he can TRUST. THAT is the torch I want to pass on. I want Jake to see that when Mommy starts to worry about something, she prays and asks God to help her take those thoughts captive and place the life/situation/person in His hands.
This is a cute email, and yes it has some “truth” in it about the difficulties of being a parent. It’s not easy. You want the best for your child. You don’t want them to hurt, or go hungry, or make bad decisions. You want to always know that they are okay. You want to know that they are tucked in safe and warm at night. BUT these thoughts cannot consume you!! When they do, the enemy is getting a foothold in your life and will TORMENT you as long as you allow it. Deceit is his FAVORITE weapon. He will allow us to take our thoughts and RUN. He doesn’t even have to do anything. We will do all his work for him when we let worry run amuck within us. “What if… What if… What if… Suddenly we are allowing those what if’s to become absolutes. We now have convinced ourselves (while the enemy sits by and applauds our efforts) that our husband is in a ditch on the side of the road when he’s not home when we expect him to be. When really he got held up unexpectedly at the office and had forgotten to turn his ringer back on after an important meeting with the boss. When we worry we create these false “realities” that the enemy uses against us. You see, satan doesn’t want us to live with a peace that passes all understanding. He wants us to live a life of torment, of worry and of fear.
Praise God that through the atoning blood of our Savior Jesus Christ that is NOT the life we have to live. I’ve read the end of the book and SATAN LOOSES. CHRIST IS VICTORIOUS. Through Christ we can have victory over our thoughts, worries and fears. THANK YOU JESUS!!
What I plan to do is, Train him (Jake) up in the way he should go and when he is older he will not depart from it…. Prov. 22:6.
THAT is the torch I intend to pass along to my children!! I hope you are encouraged and will pass THIS along to others. Let’s raise up the next generation under the nurture and admonition of THE LORD…… not worry and fear.
December 1st
13 years ago
